Charlie Sheen proves naysayers wrong. Starts "winning" at everything

After months of awful reviews and critics pouncing on his every mistake, Charlie Sheen has finally had enough. "I just decided I couldn't take it anymore", said Sheen after his world record 100-meter butterfly event. "I've been waiting for the right moment when everyone thought I was down and out of the game...well I'm not."


Within the last four days, Charlie has joined the San Francisco Giants and is batting 1000, won the PGA Wyndham Golf Championship by 28 strokes, took the Nascar Sprint Cup by a full 15 minutes, and has qualified for every event in the 2012 Summer Olympics in London. When asked what his motivating factor was in accomplishing such miraculous feats in less than a week, he simply replied, "Oh, it's definitely the drugs."